


dearly beloved

by ekoroshia



Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending ??? does the canon ending count as happy, Big Spoilers (mastermind + deaths), surprisingly i didn't spend a thousand words talking about rantaro's gorgeous face in this one
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-05
Updated: 2018-04-05
Packaged: 2019-04-18 20:43:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,466
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14221437
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ekoroshia/pseuds/ekoroshia
Summary: In retrospect it was a pity he died before either of them realized what was going on.





	dearly beloved

If he were to be honest with himself, he would come to the conclusion quickly that he’d been interested in Rantaro from the beginning. Even with that hat still pulled low over his eyes, Shuichi was observant. He watched and he listened and he mulled over each and every one of his classmates when he wasn’t rushing around trying to impress Kaede.

 

At the time he hadn’t paid much attention to his gut feelings, still having yet to learn that it was safe to trust himself, but in truth Rantaro had caught his eye from the moment their eyes met across the gym. In the chaos following the revelations about their purpose in the school, he’d had no time to approach his classmate; though in retrospect the taller boy had seemed to stray carefully from the center of attention unless absolutely necessary.

 

Shuichi was, for lack of a better word, enticed. It was no secret that he enjoyed puzzles, after all it was that same love that resulted in his talent being given to him (whether he thought he deserved it or not). Rantaro presented a puzzle unlike anything he’d encountered before. It wasn’t a matter of finding the solution to a problem, or of solving a murder, but rather it was a matter of figuring out just who Rantaro was, and what made him tick.

 

Unlike the rest of his classmates, who had quickly established themselves as strong personalities, Rantaro seemed to choose each word carefully. As though he knew more than he was willing to let on, and of course there was the matter of his talent. That particular piece of the great mystery Shuichi came to realize seemed to embody itself in Rantaro was arguably more exciting than the rest.

 

He knew based on his observations that Rantaro had prior knowledge of aspects of this killing game that no one else shared, and it wasn’t hard to imagine that he had known his talent all along, but was keeping it secret. For whatever reason, Shuichi silently began to believe that Rantaro’s bluff about not remembering his talent was just that - a lie to hide the truth. He had nothing to base this on but for small aspects of Rantaro’s behavior and speech that seemed to point in the direction of a higher level of understanding than the rest of his classmates. The more he thought about it though, the more it made sense.

 

Shuichi didn’t believe Rantaro was the mastermind, but he was slowly becoming more and more aware that Rantaro  _ knew  _ things. Things about the school, about the reasons they were here. Little things that would have meant nothing and that Shuichi would have believed were coincidence were it not for the frequency at which they occurred. Were it not for the rate at which Rantaro subtly proved over and over that he knew more than he was saying.

 

What was even more interesting was that Rantaro seemed equally as interested in him, as on more than on occasion he'd caught sight of a measured green gaze watching him from the other side of the room. Shuichi tended towards the belief that if he really tried, he could read expressions guarded or not, but Rantaro's was an immaculate mask he couldn't decipher.

 

_ After this is resolved,  _ Shuichi thought to himself as he and Kaede prepared the library for their trap to catch the mastermind in action,  _ After this is resolved, I’ll try and talk to him.  _

 

And suddenly he was in the class trial, the blank stare of Rantaro’s portrait glaring almost mockingly at him, and he was crying, weeping, as Kaede encouraged him to face the truth with all his heart. His tears were for her, first and foremost, but they were also for Rantaro, just as they were for everyone present. He knew then that their plan to end this killing game had only jump-started it. There would be no going back from this point, and he knew in his heart that Monokuma’s game had only just begun.

 

From that point on, he tended to avoid thinking about Rantaro. Kaede, of course, was on his mind whenever he found conversation lulled or a dark mood swept over the room. He thought of her more than he could remember thinking of anyone. For as long as he could remember, he had never met anyone so willing to help him become a better person than she had been. He treasured her memory, and as the number of students began to dwindle from fourteen to five, it was becoming harder to remember his promise to her.

 

He and the others pushed on though, despite everything still determined to see this through, to find salvation for their lost friends, and to find an ending for themselves. As the final curtain lifted on the decisive sixth class trial and that same stupid routine began again, Shuichi felt himself losing grip on the belief that there was light at the end of the tunnel at all.

 

Through the revelations about the true nature of the killing game, about who had strung them all along like puppets, and about the culprit of Rantaro’s murder, Shuichi lost confidence in the world. He had never believed it was a good place, and had never truly been willing to turn a blind eye to the truth - even before Kaede, he had been forced to reluctantly accept the reality of the consequences of his actions. But with everything Tsumugi said, he found that treacherous part of his mind that had reared its head only a few days before echoing that same phrase in the back of his mind.

 

They should all have just died a long time ago.

 

There was no “hope” or “despair”, there was only the cruelty of the world outside, the sickening aftertaste of learning that they had all, once, been the same way. The realisation that everyone had died for entertainment and entertainment alone weighed heavily on Shuichi’s mind, and in that moment he unwillingly thought back to Rantaro. To the boy who had been closer than any of them realized to stopping everything, who had almost, almost solved the mystery.

 

It wasn’t really possible for any other person to understand exactly the emotions running through Shuichi’s mind as he denied a “hope” ending or a “despair” ending, but, he thought bitterly, if anyone would have been able to come close, it would have been him. Recalling the last thoughts he had of Rantaro before they all found his body in the library brought nausea to his stomach and grief to his mind. He had been so interested, so prepared and ready to, for the first time in his life, actively approach someone of his own volition for the express purpose of getting to know them.

 

They could have become close, could have shared theories about the mastermind or about anything else. Shuichi had believed that they were the same kind of person, deep down. He had  _ wanted _ to know Rantaro. He had  _ wanted _ to talk to him, spend time with him, figure out the things he wasn’t telling the others.

 

Shuichi had been looking forward to spending time with Rantaro more than anyone else, except perhaps Kaede, and to learn that he had died for nothing brought bile to the back of his throat. He didn’t consider himself an easily angered person, and thought he had a good grasp of what set him off and how to calm himself down before he snapped at someone. But knowing that Rantaro, that Kaede, that Kaito, and Ouma, and Gonta, and everyone else had died for nothing at all? That made him sick to his stomach.

 

Were it not for the quietly reassuring presences of the remaining students - his friends - standing by his side as they too rejected the endings presented, Shuichi could not have continued on. But it was standing there, at his podium, watching with relief as his friends, too, chose to stand with him instead of opting to sacrifice any more people that he realized Kaede had been right. He could only have gotten his far by believing in himself and by facing the truth.

 

He had been wrong after all. It was not better that they had died. To still be breathing after everything was more of a miracle than the curse he had believed it to be. It was a promise to make a new start, outside the walls and confines of the crumbling school. Talents or no talents, they would live for their friends. For everyone who had put their trust in him.

 

And as he, together with Maki and Himiko, watched the blue sky overhead through the broken glass of what had served as their cage, Shuichi believed he could try again.

**Author's Note:**

> the ending is a little clunky orz
> 
> admittedly this was more of a self indulgent study of the way saihara's appreciation for rantaro might have started, might have existed, might have developed. but still. i hope it was enjoyable and didn't sound too far-fetched...


End file.
